Move into another room- Find another room in the house and CLOSE THE CURTAINS, then resume position. They will know what you're doing but at least they don't have to see your blurry silouhettes in the background while they soap the glass.
Shut the blinds- They've probably seen it all now but to save your blushes when they ask you for their fee- make sure you have some time to finish up and throw on a robe in privacy.
Laugh and wave- If you didn't laugh you would cry with embarrassment so just have a good giggle and move on. Everyone has sex after all so it's nothing to be ashamed of. You've locked eyes now there's no going back.
Carry on- How long does it take to clean a window anyway? Probably about as long as your sex session usually lasts…. It will be over soon enough.
Pull the covers over your heads- And wait until an appropriate amount of time has passed.
Pretend you’re asleep- And you both just toss and turn a LOT during your afternoon naps.
Pretend you were doing something else- If you act quickly enough you might be able to fool them into thinking you were just reading at a peculiar angle or you know, routinely checking your partner's prostate.
Ask them to skip that window- You could cover your dignity, open the window and ask them to leave that one for another week. On a day when you're partner's not dipping his squeegee in your bucket
Leave the money with a neighbour- If you have the same window cleaner, you could ask your neighbour to pass on your share if you trust them enough to do so. That way you still get the job done but you don't have to speak to them EVER again.
Get a new window cleaner- If all else fails- tell them this will be their last call at your house- they will understand and probably be grateful that they didn't have to instigate your break up.
14 per cent of people have been caught on the toilet by their window cleaner. Unsurprisingly, a quarter of those who have been spotted by their window cleaner have been so ashamed they have never used them again.
But 13 per cent of Brits probably wish they had been after being seen having sex by their window cleaner. The embarrassing discovery was made by DirectBlinds, who surveyed over 1000 people. The shame doesn’t end there as a surprising 14 per cent have been seen on the toilet.
When asked why they were caught out, the majority felt a false sense of security as the window cleaner visited unexpectedly, with others simply forgetting to close their blinds. And unsurprisingly, a quarter of those who have been spotted by their window cleaner have been so ashamed they have never used them again.
Window cleaners themselves are not too bothered by what they have seen and 40 per cent laugh it off. But a small percentage have been so shocked by the sights through the window that they almost fell off their ladders.
One brave man shared a story about being seen through the window in a compromising position. Dale Fisk, 27, from North Yorkshire said: “Around four years ago I was on holiday with my wife in Cape Verde, where I proceeded to get sunburnt and then a bit drunk on cherry brandy. “We retired to the room, where I thought it would be a good idea to strip off and dance around naked-until I realised that the windows of our ground floor apartment were in the middle of being cleaned.
“I was mortified, but the window cleaner held in his laughter, finishing the job and leaving without making eye contact!” The window cleaner revelations come as sloshed stags are revealed to drink a month's worth of alcohol during one stag weekend.
One in ten people in the UK have been caught having sex by the window cleaner.
Get ready for more window films & coatings as marketing is bombarded at you from every angle. DigiGlass is one of many companies that coat glass & even walls (bottom picture) with other quality cleanable coverings. Although this isn't a new idea, it seems that more & more will appear now that DigiGlass at least has developed a film that meets with UK legislation with it's fire rating. The Class “O” fire rating ensures that the safety, security and branding potential of printed window film is now available for use in applications where fire safety is of particular importance. DigiGlass sought the rating following an enquiry into the potential installation of printed window film on passenger trains. In order to utilise the marketing and branding opportunities DigiGlass offers the client required certification that the product complied with relevant safety legislation.
What does this mean for the average window cleaner? Since the product is usually installed on the inside surface, it shouldn't bother many "outside only window cleaners." I have however come across exterior lamination & this does pose a problem. Water fed pole users in public areas will have to think about the slip factor & the public at large as many of the films will be added in high public concentration areas. Some of the poorer film quality from other companies will scratch with a water fed pole brush head & by the time you know it the damage is already done. I talk from experience.
For those of us that maintain interiors as well - it poses more work. For one, the drag from a squeegee is typically worse & overlapping in an "S" technique should be kept to a minimum. Even straight pulling becomes harder & drys out faster. Experience on this type of covering is crucial to keep your speed up. I recommend the Wagtail Whirlwind for this particular type of work for its wet & squeegee capabilities with minimal changeover work.
Detailing will also become more work, as we have to detail intricate cut-outs (pictured) in the coverings - this will leave more streaks. Going slower over these areas will help enormously with detailing afterwards. Don't think you can just take your scraper out either to remove those stubborn marks - you'll pass through the film like butter! A scrim will remove most hard to move marks, even making it wetter for more power without effecting the luster of the film. Because film is more phobic to dirt, this often helps in high dirt build up areas. Finally be careful with some of the scrubber covers you choose, these can often lead to damage on the poorer quality films.
Personally speaking my biggest problem with window coverings is the lack of attention to cleaning the glass before these films are applied as they are often cleaned by the installers themselves. Often I find spots & marks that are under films due to the fact the installers only use a chemical containing isopropanol or similar that shines the surface making it easier for the installation & not the longevity of the appearance. This is noticeable as time goes on. Removing the film? This is another topic entirely, the longer the film is on the harder it is to remove. Sun adds to the bonding of the film to the glass & old film comes off in shards, not in sheets. More often than not - the film is placed on defective tempered glass where the window was in bad shape in the first place & was used to disguise the fact. So uncovering the film for the new shop owner only leads to another being applied or a whole new window.
On the plus side for the business shop owner -PET (Polyethylene terephthalate) window film has a range of benefits and applications, which can all be enhanced by the utilising the marketing and branding opportunities. DigiGlass offers the client required certification that the product complied with relevant safety legislation. Dave Macdonald, Managing Director of DigiGlass commented, “The Class “O” Fire Rating was an important achievement for DigiGlass and came about as a direct result of client demand. “ He added, “The rating has broadened the appeal of printed window film far beyond its traditional market and will ensure that we will see some really innovative applications of the product in the near future. It is especially pleasing that DigiGlass is at the forefront of the developments in what is an exciting and growing industry.”
One of the key benefits of 100micron PET film is its shatterproof protection, which complies with The approved code of practice for Reg. 14. The fire rating compliments the existing benefits to provide a robust and cost effective solution for businesses seeking to bolster the security and safety of glazed areas. Of course this decision is often not only a business wish but also a legal requirement. DigiGlass printed window film is already finding application with Architects, Interior Designers and Corporate Clients who are exploiting the opportunity to produce bespoke graphics for internal and external glass areas. Often through marketing or design agencies, corporate clients are using DigiGlass to enhance the appearance of glass areas and maximise the opportunities for branding. The unique DigiGlass print process incorporates white into the design process to provide seamless high impact graphics that give the appearance of being printed direct to the glass.
Another year passes, well for me at least. Thanks to all those that posted on my facebook account to wish me the best - those that didn't - apparently birthdays are in the top left corner under events! Never have window cleaners had a greater chance to spread the word of their services & get the word out to their customers than now. I'm still wondering if those in my local circle really should know every day or week whether they should be bombarded with the fact that I am a window cleaner everyday, like some other services. I've never been one to sound my own trumpet, yet I get bombarded on a daily basis by 'facebook friends' telling me what they offer via private messages. Sooner or later the delete key becomes 'hide this service' & without even knowing it they've done more harm than good.
With the news today of facebook setting up a new application called 'places,' everyone could know where you are at any time. Is that a good thing? Big brother has really arrived, now more than ever, where every detail of your working life could be detailed & tracked by clients, colleagues, competitors & also unscrupulous systems & all this information is given freely. Google streetview are currently under study in Spain, for perhaps picking up more information of their surroundings than they should have. We are becoming a generation where soon accounting for your actions or where you've been will soon be a documented event. Even so, I'll leave it up to you to decide if this is a good thing or not. Personally I like to err on the side of caution & perhaps kill my authenticity. Privacy has become a debate in itself.
On the other hand, facebook has become a great interactive way of keeping in touch with not only friends but personal interests. I've never had so many window cleaning colleagues in my life & it's great to text-chat online. At any one time I can know if my friends are rained off or are sweltering in the heat or some even resort to snapping a photo of the most exotic insects in their work day. Some even post problem photos of the most awkward windows to clean & get answers on the go. Now that's technology!
If you wish to get updates from this blog in your own facebook account - you can follow it here. Or if you wish to interact on a personal level click my picture below. I'll leave you with this guide so that just once, you may have a look at your own facebook account & not suffer identity theft. It's entitled "7 things to stop doing now on Facebook."
Using a weak password: Avoid simple names or words you can find in a dictionary, even with numbers tacked on the end. Instead, mix upper- and lower-case letters, numbers, and symbols. A password should have at least eight characters. One good technique is to insert numbers or symbols in the middle of a word, such as this variant on the word "houses": hO27usEs!
Leaving your full birth date in your profile: It's an ideal target for identity thieves, who could use it to obtain more information about you and potentially gain access to your bank or credit card account. If you've already entered a birth date, go to your profile page and click on the Info tab, then on Edit Information. Under the Basic Information section, choose to show only the month and day or no birthday at all.
Overlooking useful privacy controls: For almost everything in your Facebook profile, you can limit access to only your friends, friends of friends, or yourself. Restrict access to photos, birth date, religious views, and family information, among other things. You can give only certain people or groups access to items such as photos, or block particular people from seeing them. Consider leaving out contact info, such as phone number and address, since you probably don't want anyone to have access to that information anyway.
Posting your child's name in a caption: Don't use a child's name in photo tags or captions. If someone else does, delete it by clicking on Remove Tag. If your child isn't on Facebook and someone includes his or her name in a caption, ask that person to remove the name.
Mentioning that you'll be away from home: That's like putting a "no one's home" sign on your door. Wait until you get home to tell everyone how awesome your vacation was and be vague about the date of any trip.
Letting search engines find you: To help prevent strangers from accessing your page, go to the Search section of Facebook's privacy controls and select Only Friends for Facebook search results. Be sure the box for public search results isn't checked.
Permitting youngsters to use Facebook unsupervised: Facebook limits its members to ages 13 and over, but children younger than that do use it. If you have a young child or teenager on Facebook, the best way to provide oversight is to become one of their online friends. Use your e-mail address as the contact for their account so that you receive their notifications and monitor their activities. "What they think is nothing can actually be pretty serious," says Charles Pavelites, a supervisory special agent at the Internet Crime Complaint Center. For example, a child who posts the comment "Mom will be home soon, I need to do the dishes" every day at the same time is revealing too much about the parents' regular comings and goings.
